Depression

I have so many things depressing me right now.  I am currently in Vegas.  Hospice is in place.  I came to spend time, precious time, with him.  I am taking this minute to collect myself before I go there and really assess what is happening.  I just got here yesterday.  He looked happy to see us, but, he seemed to tire quickly.  I am scared.  I don't want to accept this.  I want to scream.  I want to yell.  I want to cry.  I've cried so many tears lately for so many reasons.  However, none of the reasons hurt as much as death.