My Fuller family brought Steves ashes to me today. They had gone to Betty's and picked him up last night and drove him from Las Vegas. I had no idea the emotions I would feel when I woke up this morning. When you know a person for decades. It is just intense. I was going to put the memorial on here, but, had to ask for help transcribing it. I haven't even read this blog. I just can't. I am having a hard time articulating what it is that I am feeling. It's like a am speechless. I simply don't know what to say.
It's the "take your breath away" type of pain. An ache from so deep inside my chest. The tears come like waves on the ocean. If you have ever sat on the shore and watched, there are generally waves, waves, waves, BIG one. Waves, waves, waves, BIG one.
When Steve was alive and I thought he had more time, I asked him to come and spend my birthday with me. Then, he could stay for a couple weeks and go to Aaron and Taja's Wedding. My birthday is Monday. I just called my Grandmother and asked her if I could keep him here until my birthday. She said I could keep him until I am ready to bring him in. I just love her. She sent me this birthday card that made me cry, telling me how much she loved me and how she wanted to keep close. What am I going to do when it is her? She is shook up because in the last month she has cared for a buried her son and then flew 48 hours on an Israel - Holy Land trip. She sounded better today than when I saw her last weekend. I am grateful for her health.
